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Showing posts from September, 2010

September Sadness

No workouts logged.

After hearing of my father's death last month I was shattered. I felt like I was crushed by a stampede of elephants. What is strange is when he had his fatal heart attack, I was running and my chest felt tight, which it never does. After that I was in shock, couldn't eat or sleep and had no motivation to do anything, but I had to rise to the occasion and take care of whatever needed to be done.

I finally feel as if I am *beginning* to accept he's gone but a part of me doesn't want to. A part of me is angry that a heart attack brought on by type 2 diabetes & high blood pressure took him away early and that I won't get to see him again. We had made plans to go on a trip together. I will use the anger to stay active and vigilant. Then again, we can only do so much to stay healthy. I'm just glad I had presence of body and mind to be helpful to my family in some way.

My dad is larger than life now, he is everywhere. I can hear his voice inside m…