9/26/10

September Sadness

No workouts logged.

After hearing of my father's death last month I was shattered. I felt like I was crushed by a stampede of elephants. What is strange is when he had his fatal heart attack, I was running and my chest felt tight, which it never does. After that I was in shock, couldn't eat or sleep and had no motivation to do anything, but I had to rise to the occasion and take care of whatever needed to be done.

I finally feel as if I am *beginning* to accept he's gone but a part of me doesn't want to. A part of me is angry that a heart attack brought on by type 2 diabetes & high blood pressure took him away early and that I won't get to see him again. We had made plans to go on a trip together. I will use the anger to stay active and vigilant. Then again, we can only do so much to stay healthy. I'm just glad I had presence of body and mind to be helpful to my family in some way.

My dad is larger than life now, he is everywhere. I can hear his voice inside my head. He was a great musician and I have recordings of his music that I can listen to and cherish. He will continue to inspire and teach me as time goes on.

March in Pictures

Rainbows in the rain ShapingSF History Tour Bike commuting Signs of spring in the Presidio Time to swim and SUP! ...